I got scared today! I'd transferred the last of the ministry money from the savings to the checking. Still looking at over $1000 of expenses in the next three months... I got scared. I'd prayed with a friend about the provisions needed for the ministry, even asked if I was being sinful in my fear. She reminded me Satan lobs fear in our faces to hide the face of God and we had to forge past. Knees shaking, I headed to the bank the next morning. The checking account said $8.00.
Our ministry savings account had $350. Transfer $300 from savings to checking and then pray God provides, I thought. The clerk, sensing my apprehension, patted my hand, "He'll provide."
Sure He will, I thought to myself.
I headed to the car teary-eyed and asked my husband to stop by the post office to check the ministry mail. I slipped my key into the PO Box and twisted. "God you gotta provide!"
Pulling open the door, a long white envelope lay tilted to one side. I smiled and tore open the envelope. A check for $300 stared back at me. I'd held on to that last $300 in our ministry savings for an emergency. I'd gone to the bank fully intending to add my personal money to the kitty. Instead, I trusted God and moved $300 from savings to checking.
Why was I so surprised that God had provided the exact amount we needed when I had let loose and trusted?
I still don't know where the remaining $1000+ funds will come from, but I'm sure God has already figured it out. I'm certain He tapping His toes, waiting for me to trust Him for provision. If I can trust Him with our finances, I can trust everything thing else.Including my life.
All too often, God makes me wait. In fact, sometimes He reeks havoc on my ulcer because I'm a sinful worrier. It's how I'm wired.
Eddie and I wrote today's He Said, She Said devotions on John 11:4-6.
"When he heard this, Jesus said, 'This sickness will not end in death. No, it is for God's glory so that God's Son may be glorified through it.' Jesus loved Martha and her sister and Lazarus. Yet when he heard that Lazarus was sick, he stayed where he was two more days."
This verse struck Eddie on the illness part...but me...it was all about the glory. It was all about God making me wait, just like Jesus made Mary and Martha wait. He knew the ultimate outcome and He wasn't in a hurry. Ya see, that's monumental to me because I expect an answer before it's too late. I'm a Mary and Martha. And when I pray and pray and God doesn't show, I'm a little hurt and a lot disappointed. The thing is I'm learning about the glory of God and how to GLORIFY God. It's not about me. It's about Him and how the situation will bring glory and witness to God the Father.
I've always joked that Jesus was a dawdler. And He was. When You're God incarnate, when you have the inside spoof on the plan, then what's another day or two? Nothing! Lazarus died, and then HE DIDN'T. And had Jesus come prior to his death, the impact wouldn't have been near as amazing.
Jesus finally showed, Lazarus was revived, Mary and Martha probably danced a jig, but more than anything else, God was glorified by the wait.
So I sigh. My stomach hurts a little. I sniff and tear up because I'm amazed by the glory and frightened by the wait. Regardless, God knows what He's doing and makes no bones about proving Himself either.
When I turned loose of the tiny savings the ministry had...when I took it out and handed it over to God, literally within minutes He provided. He doubled the money.
When I handed the check over to the teller she asked if I wanted the money in savings (after she squealed "Wickedly cool!!!) and I didn't hesitate.
"No way! You don't save God's money. You spend it where He says." I've since paid down a couple of the ministry bills but there's still more to come. And even though I'm a little scared as I fight this spiritual warfare, you need to know, I've not looked at the on-line banking so I don't know the balance. God will provide. He always, ALWAYS does.
Yep, that provision story happened to me so it's safe for me to say, "There's glory in that!"
Check out the book. You'll be glad if you do. I encourage you to buy it, read it then leave it on someone's seat. Let them read it. Leave a note in it and tell that reader to read the book then leave it in yet another place for someone else to read. It's not about selling books, it's about spreading God's word. Faith and FINANCES: In God We Trust (A Journey to Financial DEPENDENCE).
It's pretty cool when God takes hold of your money.
Send me your comments and stories of how God has blessed you when you released your finances to Him.